Your best mate has a big party tomorrow and they're FREAKING the F out about being ill-prepared! YOU…* Act as if you have NOTHING on your agenda take on their entire to-do list with Gusto and %1000 of your energy and devotion...but inevitably have to bail a little early, or show up a little late. Offer to help, then have to cancel because you totally spaced on having a prior engagement. So instead, offer to show up after the party to help clean up. Produce a detailed list of everything you have going on as a backup for why you MIGHT not be able to contribute...then pull an all-nighter and show up %1000 like they knew you would. You're throwing yourself a Birthday party! (because why wouldn't you? You don't want to burden anyone with that...it's YOUR birthday, it's not their problem). Your siggy other demands it be adults only, but loads of your friends have mini me's! YOU…* Hire a Nanny service to be located in the bottom story of the home so everyone can come. Cause you handle yo' ish! Only send invites to your friends without children and dread the moment when your other friends catch on. Get in a huge fight with your siggy b/c despite the fact that you don't really want kids there either, it's TOO HARD to have that discussion with your parent friends so screw it! you just won't have a party. And you'll be all salty telling everyone how it was "a whole thing" and "he's an ass, that's what happened" The Event starts at 6pm SHARP...YOU…* Had plenty of time to get ready but stuff just kept happening. So you flood the host's inbox with exact ETA's and reasons why it's for real not your fault. You are always there for them, so it shouldn't be a big deal, but you feel guilty AF. When you arrive you're filled with anxiety and have already decided if anyone mentions it they're dead to you. You're overbooked so you notify the host at 5:55pm that you "might not" be able to make it. Then you have an argument with your siggy other (or yourself) because now they're feeling mad rushed because you didn't have your ish together. So NOW...though you COULD have made it, you definitely aren't in the mood and don't want to bring that negativity to the table...so you stay home. But are too embarrassed to send a final "yeah definitely won't make it, I’m sorry" text. Arrive early, because you're a responsible adult, but refuse to let loose and have a legit good time because you can't stop thinking about everything you STILL have to do. Meanwhile your expression and anxiety are palpable so there's a Mouse in the house that will spend the entire event trying to make you feel better while you unload your "list" upon them. A loved one is STRUGGLING, and has been for a while, but refuses to allow you to help. They have however asked for your "support" and demand an ear to VENT to...YOU…* Just allow them to vent. You don't want to scare them off so you find yourself reaffirming their unhealthy views. Sometimes a friend just needs to be there. And you're happy to be there for them, even though you come out of it feeling used, and burdened by their anxieties and sadness. They'll appreciate you for it. Say "Nah" I can't sit idly by while you vent, cause I CAN'T agree with you and you wont let me help! BUT…girl I WILL get you drunk. Get ready cause I'm 'bout to show up with matching footies, an exorbitant amount of Chinese Food, and 2 Magnums of Pinot Grigio. Let them vent and gladly use it as an opportunity to unload your own crap. You leave the conversation feeling both drained and relieved, and pat yourself on the back for allowing them to unload on you, cause you reciprocate that need sometimes and you appreciate the F out of that mutual understanding. Your bestie won the argument over WHO is going to pick up the tab...YOU…* Feel like an undeserving fresh sack of crap, and CAN'T utter the words THANK YOU without following it up with "I just feel so bad!" Get legit PISSED. then realize it's not cute, and declare that you GOT the next one , with an evil smirk. But not before you've made a few people uncomfortable with your near tantrum. Put up way too little of a fight, because you don't want to make your friend lose face, then hide a 20spot in their to go bag while they're in the bathroom. Releasing you of all guilt and placing you back on top of the IOU game. You have Amazebawls plans tonight, you're ready to GOOO, but your partner in crime got sick AF out of nowhere...YOU…* Like a Ninja, remove your bra from the armhole of your rockin outfit, grab the keys and demand a list of their comfort foods and symptoms so you can raid Walmart's pharmacy and soup aisle accordingly. Secretly feel relieved because there's an ENTIRE list of crap that you HATE but requires your immediate attention and really you were lying to yourself in the first place about deserving the night off. Feel bad, because they feel bad, so you agree to push back the start time for a solid hour to see if they miraculously begin to feel better...but they don't so then you sit their, fully dressed until they give you permission to cancel completely.